Thursday, August 8, 2013

Becoming A Parent

I have only been a parent for eight and a half months.But I feel like I became a parent the moment I found I was pregnant. I stepped into this role without knowing what to do. I parent off of what I feel.I often look around at those around me and I say do they feel the same way about parenting that I do.Most people around me have been doing this parenting thing for a lot longer than I have but sometimes I question their decisions. I question if they ever really gave up anything or if they truly care at all. Now I know that may step on somebodies toes but these are real questions that I ask myself.No we are not the perfect parents to Mack because half the time we are just going with the flow.But it is nothing in the world we would not do for her.Since becoming a mom I have learned that the things I really want to do or have comes second to her needs.So many days I go off of a couple hours of sleep, change my plans cause she needs me or I just can't leave her and go without the things I want so she can have the best of what she needs.I work a job that I do not like because Mack comes first.It was a time I would have walked out of this job a long time ago but I think about Mack.I think about all the things she would have to give up because I wanted to be selfish and leave my job. Her dad works seven days a week so that she can have a nice place to stay and go to school everyday.Is it hard sometimes with him being gone so much? Yes it is but we do what we have to do to take care of our family.So do I give a side eye to people who don't step up to the plate and do what they are suppose to do? Yes I do because some of these people are just selfish at the end of the day.Being a parent is hard and some days you might not have any clue what to do but you figure it out.But I said all of that to say grow up and become a parent to yours.Don't look for anyone else to take that on because they shouldn't have to.I will give my last for Mack because I am her parent.She can't fight for the things she needs or defend herself in situations beyond her control.That is my job because she is just a baby who looks to her parents to do that for her.I know I may have stepped on some toes but sometimes things need to be said.Until next time kisses :)

Thursday, June 20, 2013

Five Things for Mackenzie

I have so much that I want to write about but little time to get it done. So before I jump into what I really want to write about today I will give you a update on our father's day. Even thought he had to work I think it went really well. Mack made Him a gift at school and we had a few things for him at the house. We made him a basket with some his favorite things. Overall we had a good day. But it was a little bittersweet for me. I have never celebrated father's day with my own father so it was a big deal for me. I wanted Him to have a good day and know that we appreciate all the hard work he does.We love him to pieces!!

Everyday I think about the things that I want to teach Mackenzie as she grows into a young lady.It seems like that is so far away but time is going by so fast right now.It seems just like yesterday she was coming home from the hospital and now she is eating solid food. It is so much that I want her to know about this world we live in. But this is just a short little list of things I want her to know.

1.Be true to who you are. Always be true to yourself.Growing up you are going to have the pressure to fit in and be like those around you. But never change who you are because you are one of a kind.Follow your heart to what ever it is you want to do. Listen to that little voice in your heart to be who you are. I have always been called different by those around me.I tried to fit in with those around me and I wasn't happy. But when I decided to be true to who I am I have been happy.Don't be afraid to be who you are my love.

2.You are beautiful. I tell you everyday that you are beautiful.No one else has to tell you that because I do. No need to look for that validation from anyone else because you get that from home.You are beautiful my Bean.

3.Real friends are hard to find. Real friends are hard to find. When you have a real friend always treat them with respect. You will know when you find that one friend that will be there through thick and thin. Don't get me wrong you are going to have your issues but the test is how you work them out.Sometimes that friend is the person you least expect.

4.Laugh. Sometimes you have to stop and take a moment to just laugh.I believe that laughter is healing for the soul. You are going to have situations when all you can do it laugh. Now don't get me wrong you have to know when to be serious.It is a time and place for everything.Just know that you don't have to take everything so serious all the time.

5. You are loved. You my dear are one of the most loved little girls that I know. They don't have the words to describe the amount of love your mommy and daddy has for you.Also you have a family that loves you.You my Bean are blessed to know what it feels like to be loved.

It is so much more that I want to teach you about this thing we call life.I love this saying live like today is your last and dance like no one is watching. Love you so very much Mackenzie aka Bean.

Mack's Mommy

Tuesday, May 28, 2013

My Joy

The last time I had a chance to write a blog I was six months pregnant with my greatest joy Mackenzie (Bean). On November 23 she made her entrance into this world. A very quick entrance. The first time I saw that little face I fell in love. I knew I would love her but I had no idea how much I would love her. She is everything that I expected her to be and more. Everyday is a learning experience for us. I am not going to lie and say it has been easy because it has not. I wasn’t able to breast feed like I had planned. We found out that she had acid reflux and most recently a protein allergy. Then it is just the days that I feel completely overwhelmed and I don’t know what to do. But then I look into those little eyes and everything seems ok. Since she has come into this world I have had to do some fighting for her. I had to become an adult. I have to make the best decisions for my family. I would like to think that everyone has been supportive and happy for us but that is not true. But since becoming a mom I have learned that none of that matters. What matters the most to me is that my little family has everything that they need. Yes that means going back to work before I was ready. Sending Mackenzie to daycare. Standing up to family members and coworkers who question my decisions. I have made some mistakes these last six months and I can admit that but I have learned from them. Also since having Mackenzie I have learned that all of your relationships change.Some of the changes are good changes and others are not so good.Personally I can say that some of my friendships with people have been nonexistent since I become a mom and that is fine with me. It does sting a little in the beginning but you get over it fast.I like to think that my relationship with Him has been ok since adding our bundle of joy. We are still learning how to balance being awesome and cool parents with having our own separate relationship. It's hard but you make it happen.Becoming a parent is not easy.It is not something that you should take lightly.Just learn from your mistakes and keep doing the best that you can. Being a mom to Mackenzie is the thing to ever happen to me.She is my greatest joy. Mack's Mommy